The Need for the Gift of Beauty

Winter in Oregon is tough for me. Gray. Wet. Gray. Cold. Gray. Damp. Gray. And so it goes. Even with the advent of Spring, (I think), I find myself stuck in the cycle of Gray. Wet. Gray. Cold. Gray. Damp. Gray. This morning, on my walk, as we slowed to a new-found, granted temporary, rhythm of Spring Break, I started to becomes aware of COLOR. Green grass. Yellow daffodils. Purple crocus. Ah....beauty.

Now, sitting in my home, darkened by the gray skies outside, I crave color. I crave beauty. I'm currently watching a home-decorating. Oh, that is a gift I wish that God had given me. The gift, the ability, to create beauty where I am. I crave beauty, and yet I feel paralyzed in my abilities to create beauty. It doesn't help that my home is cluttered with the mess of the weekend and the beginnings of Spring break.

People's giftings make certain tasks seem so easy. Their gift flows from them with ease and grace. I have always felt that somehow God skipped over me in my gifts. I don't automatically see where my giftings are. I want so badly to decorate my home with ease. I hate being paralyzed by my own fears of just jumping into that. I crave the beautiful. Why can't I create beauty.

A couple of weeks ago, in Sunday school, a friend suggested that may gift was writing. I struggle with that because I see others who write so much better. But, writing is as different as decorating. Each style is different and valued. So, I decided today, as I craved the gift of making beauty, I decided to test the waters of beginning my blog once again. Finding value in myself in the value of making beauty through writing.

My prayer is, as I finish this disjointed post, is that I will find value in the beauty of my writing once again. As I write, I pray that I find the beauty of color in my thoughts.

Come, Spring, bring your color.