The Last Couple of Days

I feel like I have been given a gift these last couple of days. Of course, I spent the last couple of weeks fretting about these days. In spite of all that, I have been given a gift.

Monday was Luke and I's first day "doing school" here at home. Not that we are doing a whole lot, but we are working on our letters and numbers so that next year he will be confident and prepared. The first day, even though he was a little excited about doing school at home, we had a few "resistant moments." Amazingly, he seemed to settle into it and enjoy the process.

The next day, he came and asked me if we could do school. You bet!! He really seemed excited about it. He seemed to be recalling the stuff that we studied the day before. I was so excited to see the progress that we were making. Not that we are going at the speed of light or anything....but I truly believe that I am seeing signs of him allowing himself to learn. And he seems excited about it!!

Yesterday afternoon, Luke and I met some friends at this cool place to play. It is like an indoor playground kind of concept. Luke had a blast!! He's been asking to go back from the moment that we stepped out their doors. He was running back and forth and was in perpetual motion for the whole time. He was in little boy heaven.

While I watched him play, I really just felt so blessed. As I had fretted over the decision to take him out of kindergarten, I found myself focused on the "problem." All I could see was the "problem." As I looked at the situation yesterday, I realized how much joy that that "problem" had stolen from me. I thought about our days of "school," and the progress that I was seeing....and I felt blessed. I thought of the times of just being with my son, and I felt blessed.

Then near the end of the time at the play area, I watched my son be so incredibly mature. This place had these great little scooters and a wonderful little area for them to ride on. Luke loved them. He spent most of his time just cruising around on those. He would push himself to a high speed, lean back holding onto the steering wheel, and just lay his head back in blissful, wild abandon. He was so fun to watch. At one point, he bumped scooters with a little girl when he was being blissful. He was so kind as he spoke with her and made sure she was okay. (The girl's mother wasn't so happy with him....I am hoping that she just saw the bump and didn't see his care of her daughter!) I, on the other hand, was so proud of my son. He was so thoughtful and aware of her feelings. I watched one other time as he saw another kid tip his scooter and Luke stopped to make sure he was okay. That's my boy!!

I can't tell you what that did for my heart. As I have focused on Luke's "problem," I got a little distracted on who my boy really is. I began to see him as a problem instead of him just not being ready to learn. I had forgotten what a little gem my little man really is. Learning his ABCs and his numbers will come with time. I'm learning not to fret about that. BUT the character that I have been trying to encourage in him is developing, and revealing itself NOW. The heart issues are what matter most.....those things of eternal value.

As I thought about that yesterday and today, I felt like God was confirming some things I had been thinking about. I don't believe that my son has a problem. I believe he just isn't ready. I also believe that some of Luke's "problem" was some of my misspoken words; and I have apologized to him for saying them. I also believe that God is beginning the redemption process.

God is good.