Absurdities

I've decided that it wouldn't take much for me to be an emotional eater. I'm a little under the stress zone right now and I keep fantasizing about all the ways that I could reward myself. For some reason they are all related to food. When things get crazy and I feel down and stressed, I dream of chocolate-covered, cream-filled bismarks. Mochas from Starbucks. Milkshakes. French fries. You know...all those wonderful things that are so good for your body. Not. It is a good thing that my Financial Conscience doesn't allow me to go out and purchase all those Food Fantasies....because I would probably weigh 3 times what I weigh now.

Part of my stress today has been the pending arrival of Halloween. Today I was running around trying to find last minute things for our church's Trunk or Treat. I really don't like doing errands. I find them highly annoying...especially when one has children in tow. Luke has definitely gotten better about errands, so he really wasn't so bad. I just hate driving here...get out...go into store...look around for things you need (which never seems to be completely successful. Those stores that claim to be One Stop Shopping.... lie.) Then you have to wait in line...wait for slow clerks to ring you up....haul everything out to your vehicle...reload child into van....and repeat the process again at the next location. Feels so much like a total waste of time.

Today, as I was participating in my most favorite of pass-times...running errands (aka: Shopping) I experienced some of the most absurd things in my life. Okay...maybe not my life....but most certainly my year. Can you believe that I went to at least 3 stores today to find Orange Crepe paper? You know....the streamers to decorate with. One would think that one would have no problems finding such a thing this close to Halloween where one of the predominant colors is Orange. Oh no....that would not be the case. I have always had success at the Dollar Store for crepe paper....but not today. Target didn't even look like they had ever had orange crepe paper. I read all the little price labels to see. There was NO orange at all. I stopped in at Albertson's....hoping that maybe they would be able to rescue me. Nope. Couldn't find a roll of crepe paper of any color....much less orange. Now my one place that I didn't go to to look for orange crepe paper was Safeway. I was in there at 10:30 p.m. last night getting milk. I thought to eliminate today's errands by purchasing needed items there. But, when I found that a set of Crayola Markers was $4.84 (!!!!!), I decided not to investigate their crepe paper selection.

While checking out Target, I decided that I would stop in at their local Starbucks and treat myself to my current fave: Pumpkin Spice Latte. Yum. The lady at the counter informs me, that due to a staff member's failure to show up for duty, she can only serve me a free cup of regular coffee as she was not "Starbucks Certified." Over the years, I have learned to enjoy coffee a little....as long as it is doctored...if you know what I mean. A plain ol' cup of coffee??? Might as well drink water straight out of the mud puddle. The really absurd thing about this experience for me, was that this is the second time in a week this has happened to me. I don't usually indulge in Starbucks very often. It is a treat. To have this treat denied two times in a row....what's up, Starbucks? Have I cursed you somehow? Please. This time, the lady did give me a coupon. It says: "We apologize...blah..blah..blah...When we see you next, please enjoy a cup of anything you like, on us....blah...blah...blah." Well...it better be a "doctored" coffee....because heated up mud-water ain't gonna cut it.

My last absurdity of the day for me occurred at Blockbuster Video. I don't normally frequent Blockbuster. Tim for some reason has a hard time paying to watch something....particularly movies. He also lacks the ability to just sit, relax, and watch a full movie. I think it is that sitting still, "doing nothing" thing. But I digress. I only share my lack of Blockbuster Knowledge with you to explain why I found this next thing so incredibly absurd. The clerk was helping the gals in front of me who were renting a couple of videos. Here is her closing comment, verbatim: "Here are your movies. They are a two day rental with a seven day grace period. So, they are due back here no later than next Thursday." Am I the only one who finds this a little absurd??? Why do you call it a two day rental when, with the next words out of your mouth, you say that they are due back in 9 days?

Whatever.